the rest of my life

is for doing other things. right now i am enjoying my little boys while they are little-the good eater days and the the DOH! days. that is how august says No. i am enjoying doing all the "little" things i grew up seeing my mom do. i was always one of those people who was going to do everything different than how i was raised. i was going to live Somewhere Else so that when i called back home i could talk about how different the weather was over there. in a way i am revisiting snippets of my childhood staying home with my boys.
my mom is the ultimate feminist so there were no lessons on how to be a good wife or any of that BS. she didn't even try to get me in the kitchen until it was too late. therefore, i have little skill at being a SAHM. it's a weird path for me to take actually. i had all these grand ideas about going to the park or playing in the woods, which we do and enjoy, but my favorite thing to do is just be at home. sheets and towels off the clothesline and backyard splash pools take me right back to that time when i was too little for school but could hear the bell ring from our back yard.
i made lasagna and organic white corn for august tonight. i shoveled corn in my mouth trying to ignore the lasagna that i couldn't even taste. gus sure ate well. i even got a MMM out of him. we walked and walked and squirted water on each other. i sang to him while he was falling asleep and he started humming our song! i remember the first time i sang that to him when he was just a few weeks old. we were in the car and he was upset so i started rounds of You Are My Sunshine. i sang it to him when i was pregnant with hudson, so h was born already knowing that song. gus sings all kinds of songs but it brought tears to my eyes to hear that one. i kissed his toes and turned out the light. night night.